HE THAT hath wife and children hath given hostages to fortune; for they are impediments to great enterprises, either of virtue or mischief. Certainly the best works, and of greatest merit for the public, have proceeded from the unmarried or childless men; which both in affection and means, have married and endowed the public. Yet it were great reason that those that have children, should have greatest care of future times; unto which they know they must transmit their dearest pledges.
Some there are, who though they lead a single life, yet their thoughts do end with themselves, and account future times impertinences. Nay, there are some other, that account wife and children, but as bills of charges. Nay more, there are some foolish rich covetous men, that take a pride, in having no children, because they may be thought so much the richer. For perhaps they have heard some talk, Such an one is a great rich man, and another except to it, Yea, but he hath a great charge of children; as if it were an abatement to his riches. But the most ordinary cause of a single life, is liberty, especially in certain self-pleasing and humorous minds, which are so sensible of every restraint, as they will go near to think their girdles and garters, to be bonds and shackles. Unmarried men are best friends, best masters, best servants; but not always best subjects; for they are light to run away; and almost all fugitives, are of that condition.
A single life doth well with churchmen; for charity will hardly water the ground, where it must first fill a pool. It is indifferent for judges and magistrates; for if they be facile and corrupt, you shall have a servant, five times worse than a wife. For soldiers, I find the generals commonly in their hortatives, put men in mind of their wives and children; and I think the despising of marriage amongst the Turks, maketh the vulgar soldier more base.
Certainly wife and children are a kind of discipline of humanity; and single men, though they may be many times more charitable, because their means are less exhaust, yet, on the other side, they are more cruel and hardhearted (good to make severe inquisitors), because their tenderness is not so oft called upon. Grave natures, led by custom, and therefore constant, are commonly loving husbands, as was said of Ulysses, vetulam suam praetulit immortalitati.
Chaste women are often proud and froward, as presuming upon the merit of their chastity. It is one of the best bonds, both of chastity and obedience, in the wife, if she think her husband wise; which she will never do, if she find him jealous. Wives are young men’s mistresses; companions for middle age; and old men’s nurses. So as a man may have a quarrel to marry, when he will.
But yet he was reputed one of the wise men, that made answer to the question, when a man should marry, - A young man not yet, an elder man not at all. It is often seen that bad husbands, have very good wives; whether it be, that it raiseth the price of their husband’s kindness, when it comes; or that the wives take a pride in their patience. But this never fails, if the bad husbands were of their own choosing, against their friends consent; for then they will be sure to make good their own folly.
成了家的人，可以說對命運之神付出了抵押品。因為家庭難免拖累事業(yè)，而無論這種事業(yè)的性質如何。所以是能為公眾獻身人，應當是不被家室所累的人。因為只有這種人，才能夠把他的全部愛情和財產，都奉獻給唯一的情人——公眾。而那種有家室的人，恐怕寧愿把最好的東西留給自己的后代。
有的人在結婚后仍然愿意過獨身生活。因為他們不喜歡家庭，把妻子兒女看作經濟上的累贅。還有一些富人甚至以無子嗣為自豪。也許他們是擔心，一旦有了子女就瓜分現(xiàn)有的財產吧。有一種人過獨身生活是為了保持自由，以避免受約束于對家庭承擔的義務和責任。但這種人，可能會認為腰帶和鞋帶，也難免是一種束縛呢!
實際上，獨身者也許可以成為最好的朋友，最好的主人，最好的仆人，但很難成為最好的公民。因為他們隨時可以遷逃，所以差不多一切流竄犯都是無家者。
作為獻身宗教的 ，是有理由保持獨身的。否則他們的慈悲就先布施于家人而不是供奉于上帝了。作為法官與 師，是否獨身關系并不大。因為只要他們身邊有一個壞的幕僚，其進讒言的能力就足以抵上五個妻子。作為軍人，有家室則是好事，這正可以在戰(zhàn)場上激發(fā)他 們的責任感和勇氣。這一點可以從土耳其的事例中得到反證——那里的風俗不重視婚姻和家庭，結果他們士兵的斗志很差。
對家庭的責任心不僅是人類的一種約束，也是一種訓練。那種獨身的人，雖然在用起來似很慷慨，但實際上往往是心腸很硬的，因為他們不懂得對他人的愛。 一種好的風俗，能教化出情感堅貞的男子漢，例如像優(yōu)里西斯(Ulysses)那樣，他曾抵制美麗女神的誘惑，而保持了對妻子的忠貞。 一個獨身的女人常常是驕橫的。因為她需要顯示，她的貞節(jié)似乎是自愿保持的。
如果一個女人為丈夫的聰明優(yōu)秀而自豪，那么這就是使她忠貞不渝的最好保證。但如果一個女人發(fā)現(xiàn)她的丈夫是妒忌多疑的，那么她將絕不會認為他是聰明的。
在人生中，妻子是青年時代的情人，中年時代的伴 ，暮年時代的守護。所以在人的一生中，只要有合適的對象，任何時候 結婚都是有道理的。但也有一位古代哲人，對于人應當在何時結婚這個問題是這樣說的：“年紀少時還不應當，年紀大時已不必要。”美滿的婚姻是難得一遇的。常可見到許多不出色的丈夫卻有一位美麗的妻子。這莫非是因為這種丈夫由于具有不多的優(yōu)點而更值得被珍視嗎?也許因為伴隨這種丈夫，將可以考驗一個婦人的忍耐精神吧?如果這種婚姻出自一個女人的自愿選擇，甚至是不顧親友的勸告而選擇的，那么就讓她自己去品嘗這枚果實的滋味吧
