Dear Twentysomething-year-old Me,

親愛的20多歲的我：

1. When that man you have a crush on asks, "Are you a good girl or a bad girl?" laugh in his face, spin on your heel and ignore his calls.

當那個你喜歡的男孩問“你是個好女孩還是個壞女孩”時，沖他笑笑，轉身走開，忽略他打給你的電話。

2. Wear sunscreen. At least around your eyes and above your currently pert upper lip’s cupid’s bow.

要擦防曬霜。至少在眼睛周圍，和你現在完美唇形的上唇邊緣要擦。

3. Just because you share blood with people doesn’t mean you have to give them the time of day if they are hell-bent on making you feel small, misunderstood and wrong. You’ve given them enough chances. Cut the cord.

就算是你的血脈至親，也別允許他們肆意藐視你、誤解你、無端指責你。你已經給了他們很多機會了。請拜托他們的束縛。

4. Sign up for small automatic savings deposits that kick in every time you get paid. You’ll be making down payments on your own future freedom.

辦理小額的儲蓄存款通存業務，每次你發工資就可以存些錢。你在為將來會獲得的自由預知賬單。

5. Rejection is not a sign that you should stop doing what you love. It is married to doing what you love. It should not be kneecapping you. Embrace it.

被拒絕不意味著你應該放棄那些愛好，追求自己的愛好必然會遇到挫折，別讓挫折阻止你，擁抱挫折。

6. If you have a problem with a valued friend, bite the bullet and talk about it. Don’t just disappear on her or him.

如果你與某個重要的朋友不和，放下面子，和他(她)談談。不要僅僅從他(她)眼前消失。

7. Tell the truth. People really do sense it when you lie to them, and it makes them distrust you or themselves. It’s the darndest thing.

說實話。別人真的可以感覺到你在說謊，這會讓他人對你或他們自己產生不信任感。說實話是一件超贊的事情。

8. You were raised to think that you should be married well before 30 -- and that everything else you fill your life with adds up to failure if you remain single. That’s a giant bucket of steaming dookie. Be choosy. The happiness you’re chasing is actually suffusing your life right now. You will look back on this time very wistfully when you’ve got spit-up in your hair and a husband who expects hot meals, a sparkling-clean house and you to resemble the cutie he married.

你的成長環境使你覺得你應該早在30歲之前成婚——如果你30歲還單身，就會覺得生活中其他一切都是失敗的。這種想法太小題大做了。當你頭發開始分叉，丈夫等著吃飯，剛把房子打掃干凈，而你本人已經不是丈夫當年娶的小可愛的時候，你會非常渴望回到現在的時光。

9. Reconnect with your gut. I know you were raised to ignore it, and to first please others. Without a connection to your gut, you have no compass. Listen to it. If it squawks, pay attention. The more you listen to it, the more you’ll avoid messy/self-destructive detours and align with your own satisfying path.

重新關注自己的內心。我知道你的成長環境教會你首先取悅別人，而忽略自己的內心。但是如果你不去關注自己的心，就無法同情他人。傾聽自己的心吧。如果你的心在抱怨，你就必須注意了。對自己的心傾聽的越多，你就越能夠避免自暴自棄的傾向，而能夠把握自娛自樂的心境。

10. You are so beautiful right now. Your skin is amazing. Your metabolism is forgiving. You have epic amounts of energy and curiosity. Do not look to others to fuel up your self-esteem. You’re made of awesome. Own it and others will see it.

現在的你是如此美麗。你的皮膚美呆了，你的新陳代謝很旺盛。你的精力和好奇心都處于頂點。不要靠模仿別人來滿足自己的自尊心。你本身已經很贊了。把握住這種氣場，周圍的人都會看到。

11. Go easier on your mother. Every single thing that annoys and disappoints you about her will be something you recognize in yourself as you get older. That’s one big bakery full of humble pie you’re cooking up right now.

對媽媽耐心點。她身上任何使你發火或失望的特質，等以后年紀再大一些你都會在自己身上找到。你正在自釀苦酒。

12. Don’t be competitive. Be collaborative. There’s plenty of room at the table.

不要好勝，要有團隊意識。每個人都會分到一杯羹。

13. Your dream life is not something that will appear to you, or not, like an elusive, mythical unicorn. You build your own specifically perfect life every time you listen to your gut, shake off rejection, honor friends, embrace choosiness, feed your savings account and recognize your own arrogance.

你夢想的生活方式也許不會出現，如果出現，它也不會像一直神秘魔幻的獨角獸那樣現身。每次你傾聽自己的內心，戰勝挫折，珍惜朋友，擁抱對你的挑剔，增加存款，認清自己的傲慢的時候，你都在建構自己獨有的夢想生活。

Love,

愛你的，

40-Year-Old Me

40歲的我

（兼職編輯：張博）