My Very First Love

Yes this may be surprising, I was only 13 years old that time. But, don't know how or why it happened to me so early. I fell deeply in love with a guy, who I used to think was annoying 2 months ago.

It was 1997, in Chittagong, Bang- ladesh, me and my family have just moved to a new apartment in a new area. So, after few weeks have passed, I started going back to school, since it was during Ramadan we moved. Well, I made some new friends in the neighborhood. This girl who was always hanging out with, her name was Ivy.

One day when I was going to school, I bumped into Ivy on the way out of my building, and she was standing next to this guy, he lived in the building right beside mine. He said “Hi” to me, and we just asked each other “how are you” and blah blah, then I had to leave. But I noticed that guy was looking at me. It was a different kind of look, look with love in his eyes. Few days later, I noticed whenever I go to school and come back from school, he is standing in his balcony, and smiling at me. If he is not around, and one of his friends see me, they start to yell out his name. Oh yeah, by the way, his name was Mamun.

So, I was very annoyed by those things. And I even told Ivy to tell Mamun to stop these foolishness. After my exams were over, I had a break. So I used to go to the roof and read books to spend my time. Mamun used to come to their roof also and both roofs where so close to each other that you can just jump from one to another.

Once I was reading a book, and I noticed Mamun come to their roof and he looked at me, and smiled. OH MY GOD! I don't know what happened to me. That sweet smile just took me away. I smiled back at him, for the first time. I could never forget that moment. We used to smile at each other whenever we saw each other, but never had a chat. I was sure that he liked me a lot, because, anytime he would see me on the roof from his balcony, he came up to the roof right away. I fell in love with him very deeply. I was surprised that I did. The feelings I had was so beautiful and made me so happy.

Mamun did come to my roof one day to talk to me but I wanted him to go away. I didn't want any one to see us talking. As you know, in Bangladesh rumors go around so fast. When we talked, I saw deep love in his eyes. I always smiled at him; I didn't talk to him much. Still, life was going on so wonderfully. Mamun never told me he loved me. I thought that was because, I was 5/6 years younger than him.

Very soon, I found out that me and my family are leaving Bang- ladesh and coming to Canada. I was devas- tated. I cried all night but there was nothing to do. When Mamun found out, he asked me on the roof, if it was true. When I said yes, he asked how long will I be in Canada. The answer was maybe forever, we were going to settle in Canada. He looked depressed, all he said was “Oh”, then I told him out flight date.

The next month, it was Ramadan again. Mamun came to say good bye to me on the roof, he was leaving to spend his Eid with his family. That day, I was so sad, I felt like I lost something very important in my life. We said goodbye to each other, he said he thinks I am such a sweet girl, he hopes I have a great life in Canada. Oh my god, I couldn't hold myself, I think my eyes became watery. I didn't want him to see that I was crying. I said “you too” and tried to smile and left the roof right away.

That was the last day I ever saw my first love. Now 4 years later, here I am in CANADA. I have guy in my life now, whom I am deeply love with after Mamun. I never lose him.

I am ... over Mamun now. Everytime I remember those days, looking at each other on the roof, talking, I feel really down. I wonder where he is now, if we will even meet again... I can never forget my first love.

這可能會(huì)令人吃驚，因?yàn)槟菚r(shí)我才13歲。但是，我也不知道怎么那么早就降臨到我身上了。我深深地喜歡上了一個(gè)男孩，可就在那兩個(gè)月前我還認(rèn)為他是個(gè)令人討厭的家伙呢。

1997年在孟加拉國(guó)的吉大港，我和家人剛搬到一個(gè)新地方，住進(jìn)新公寓。由于我們是在齋月搬的家，因此過(guò)了幾個(gè)星期，我才開(kāi)始回到學(xué)校上學(xué)。我在街坊里交了一些新朋友，總和我一起去玩的那個(gè)女孩叫艾維。

有一天，我正要去上學(xué)，剛出家門(mén)就碰到了艾維。她站在那個(gè)男孩旁邊，他就住在我們隔壁那棟樓房里。他跟我打了聲招呼，之后我們也只是問(wèn)對(duì)方“你好嗎”之類(lèi)的話，然后我就離開(kāi)了。但我注意到那個(gè)家伙在看我，而且是一種別樣的眼神，眼里充滿愛(ài)意。幾天后，我發(fā)現(xiàn)我每次上學(xué)放學(xué)的時(shí)候，他都會(huì)站在陽(yáng)臺(tái)上朝我微笑。如果他的朋友看到我，而他又不在旁邊，他們就會(huì)對(duì)我喊他的名字。哦!對(duì)了，他叫馬蒙。

因此，我對(duì)于這些事情也十分惱火。我甚至讓艾維轉(zhuǎn)告馬蒙停止這些愚蠢的行為。考試結(jié)束后我有個(gè)短暫的假期，經(jīng)常會(huì)去屋頂看書(shū)打發(fā)時(shí)間。馬蒙也經(jīng)常去他們的屋頂，兩個(gè)屋頂之間是如此接近，甚至一跳就可以跳到另一個(gè)屋頂。

有一次，我正在看書(shū)，發(fā)現(xiàn)馬蒙也來(lái)到他們的屋頂看著我笑，哦，天哪，真不知道我怎么了，他甜美的笑容竟然把我迷住了，我不禁也對(duì)他笑了，那是第一次對(duì)他笑，我永遠(yuǎn)忘不了那個(gè)時(shí)刻。以后每次看見(jiàn)對(duì)方都互相笑一下，但從來(lái)沒(méi)說(shuō)過(guò)話。我敢肯定他非常喜歡我，因?yàn)闊o(wú)論何時(shí)他從陽(yáng)臺(tái)上看到我在屋頂上，他也馬上跑上屋頂。我自己也很驚奇，我竟然深深地喜歡上了他。這種感覺(jué)非常美妙，我也很開(kāi)心。

一天，馬蒙來(lái)到我家屋頂上跟我說(shuō)話，但我想讓他離開(kāi)。我不想其他人看見(jiàn)我們說(shuō)話。你也知道，在孟加拉國(guó)流言蜚語(yǔ)傳播很快。我們談話時(shí)，我從他眼神里看出他對(duì)我的愛(ài)戀。我并沒(méi)有和他說(shuō)太多話，總是對(duì)他微笑。生活照樣如此精彩地過(guò)著，然而馬蒙從來(lái)沒(méi)有告訴過(guò)我他喜歡我。我想這可能是因?yàn)槲冶人∥辶鶜q的原因吧。

很快地，我發(fā)現(xiàn)我們家就要離開(kāi)孟加拉國(guó)去加拿大了，我徹底絕望了，我哭了整個(gè)晚上，可這也無(wú)濟(jì)于事。馬蒙知道后，在屋頂上問(wèn)我那到底是不是真的。我說(shuō)是的，他問(wèn)我在加拿大會(huì)待多久，我說(shuō)可能是永遠(yuǎn)，我們要在加拿大定居。他看起來(lái)很沮喪，只說(shuō)了聲“哦”，之后我告訴了他航班的日期。

下個(gè)月又到九月齋月了，馬蒙來(lái)到屋頂上與我道別，他要去和他的家人過(guò)開(kāi)齋節(jié)。那天我心里特別難過(guò)，我感到我失去了生命里非常重要的東西。我們互相道別后，他說(shuō)他認(rèn)為我是一個(gè)很討人喜歡的女孩，并祝愿我在加拿大生活愉快。哦，天哪!我?guī)缀鯚o(wú)法克制自己，我想我的眼睛肯定水汪汪的，我不想讓他看到我哭了。說(shuō)完“你也是”，就努力笑了笑，馬上離開(kāi)了屋頂。

那是我最后一天見(jiàn)到我的初戀。現(xiàn)在我已經(jīng)在加拿大生活四年多了，我的生活中也有了男朋友，他是在馬蒙之后我深?lèi)?ài)的一個(gè)人，我絕不會(huì)失去他。

現(xiàn)在，我和馬蒙的事已經(jīng)過(guò)去了。每次我回憶起那些日子里，我們?cè)谖蓓斏匣ハ嗤舜肆奶欤疫€是真的感覺(jué)很難受。我不知他現(xiàn)在在哪兒，我們能否再見(jiàn)到彼此……但我永遠(yuǎn)忘不了我的初戀。