It sounded like cats jumping off the Empire State Building.

聽上去像一只貓從帝國大廈跳下來。

I’m going to reach out with a hook if you don’t shut up.

如果你再不閉嘴，我就向里面甩個魚鉤。

That was extraordinary. Unfortunately, extraordinary bad!

你的表演很特別。不幸的是，特別地差勁。

You have just invented a new form of torture.

你發明了一種折磨人的新手段。

If you had lived 2,000 years ago and sung like that, I think they would have stoned you.

如果你生活在2000年前， 唱成這樣，人們會向你扔石頭。

There’s only so much punishment a human can take. I can’t take anymore.

人類能承受的懲罰是有限的，我再也無法忍受了。

You killed my favorite.

我最喜歡的歌曲被你糟蹋了。

It is a beautiful song when you’re not singing it.

你不唱它的時候，它是首好歌。

You’re like a little hamster trying to be a tiger.

你像個小倉鼠要做大老虎。

I think you looked as if you were half-asleep throughout the song

你唱歌的時候，看起來處在半睡眠狀態 。

I couldn’t understand a single word. ... You could have been singing in Norwegian.

我一個字也聽不懂，你大概在用挪威語演唱。

Imagine 22 horses and a donkey (racing), you just wouldn’t stand a chance.

想象一下，一頭驢與22匹馬賽跑，你一點機會都沒有。

It’s like you were drunk. I’m not talking one or two bottles, I’m talking a crate.

你看起來喝多了。我說的可不是一、兩瓶，是一箱那么多。