It’s clear, from Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor’s Senate confirmation hearings, that she has a warm relationship with her family and friends, including her beloved mother and brother。

But in her rise through the legal profession, she has made a number of personal sacrifices, most notably marriage and children。

Ms. Sotomayor’s marriage to her high-school sweetheart ended after just a few years, in part, she has said, because of an excessive work schedule. ’I cannot attribute that divorce to work,’ she told a panel on judicial life. ’But certainly the fact that I was leaving my home at 7:00am and getting back at 10:00pm was not of assistance in recognizing the problems developing in my marriage.”I have found it difficult to maintain a relationship while I’ve pursued my career,’ Ms. Sotomayor also said in a television interview。

Ms. Sotomayor was subsequently engaged, but that 8-year relationship ended, too 岸 before they went to the altar. She has no children. These days, her life is ’frantically busy, fulfilling and often aloof,’ according to the New York Times. ’You make play dates with her months and months in advance because of her schedule,’ a friend of hers told the Times。

Earlier this week, we discussed Jack Welch’s views on work-life balance. He argued that for women to rise to the top, ’they’ve got to make the tough choices and know the consequences of each one.’

But such choices aren’t just necessary for women, as Juggle readers have pointed out. Men, too, often make hard sacrifices (failed marriages, missing their children grow up) to reach the pinnacles of their careers, especially in our increasingly workaholic and wired culture。

As the New York Times columnist David Brooks put it: ’This is the story of pressures that affect men as well as women (men are just more likely to make fools of themselves in response, as the news of the last few years indicates). It’s the story of people in a meritocracy that gets more purified and competitive by the year, with the time demands growing more and more insistent.’

He adds that Ms. Sotomayor’s life ’overlaps with a broader class of high achievers. You don’t succeed at that level without developing a single-minded focus, and struggling against its consequences.’

I find this all a bit depressing and reductive, because it seems like those who make it to the top must be, by necessity, workaholic automatons. I wonder, Juggle readers, is it ever possible to rise high in a profession without being an unceasing, laser-focused workaholic? Are there examples in your own workplaces of people who have managed that feat?

顯然，從最高法院大法官提名人索托馬約爾(Sonia Sotomayor)的參議院提名聽證會可以看出，她與家人和朋友都保持著溫馨的關(guān)系，這其中也包括她深愛的母親和弟弟。

但在她的法律職業(yè)生涯不斷上升的同時，她在個人生活上也付出了許多犧牲，最明顯的是在婚姻和孩子方面。

美國最高法院大法官人選索托馬約爾索托馬約爾與高中時的心上人的婚姻只持續(xù)了短短幾年就走到了盡頭，她曾表示其中部分原因是由于太過繁重的工作日程。她在一次關(guān)于司法生活的小組討論中說，我不能將離婚歸咎于工作，但早上7點離家、晚上10點才回家，這種狀況肯定無助于認(rèn)清婚姻中出現(xiàn)的問題。

索托馬約爾還曾在接受電視采訪時說，我發(fā)現(xiàn)很難在追求事業(yè)的同時維持戀情。

索托馬約爾離婚后曾再度訂婚，但這段長達(dá)8年的戀情也沒等結(jié)婚就已告終。她沒有孩子。據(jù)《紐約時報》(New York Times)報導(dǎo)，她現(xiàn)在的生活極其忙碌、充實，常常是孤身一人。她的一位朋友對《紐約時報》說，要想約她出來玩的話，得提前好幾個月預(yù)約，因為她的日程太緊了。

本周早些時候，我們討論了韋爾奇(Jack Welch)關(guān)于工作與生活平衡的觀點。韋爾奇認(rèn)為，女性要想升到高層，就必須做出艱難的抉擇，并明白每個決定的后果。

但正如讀者已經(jīng)指出的，這樣的選擇可能不光是女性必須做的。男性也常常要做出痛苦的犧牲(婚姻失敗、錯過孩子的成長)才能到達(dá)職業(yè)生涯的頂點，尤其是在我們當(dāng)前身處的這種職場文化之下--越來越工作狂，同時還要時刻保持與工作“連線”。

正如《紐約時報》專欄作家布魯克斯(David Brooks)所說的，這其實說的壓力，無論男女都受到了壓力的影響(男性只是更有可能以自欺欺人的方式應(yīng)對，過去幾年的一些新聞揭示了這一點)。精英階層的人士精益求精，競爭越來越激烈，而對時間的要求也越來越急迫。

他還寫道，索托馬約爾的生活與許多達(dá)到很高成就的人有一部分相同。如果沒有一種執(zhí)著的專注勁頭并對抗因此而造成的后果，就不可能實現(xiàn)那么高的成就。

我覺得這一切有點令人沮喪，因為看上去似乎能夠成就大事業(yè)的人都必須得是不知疲倦的工作機(jī)器。我在想，如果不充當(dāng)永無休止、精神高度集中的工作狂，有沒有可能在職業(yè)生涯中實現(xiàn)高升呢?讀者們，你們身邊有沒有能做到這樣的例子?